It’s not news that living in a house with other people – whether family, friends or strangers – can be difficult. People by their nature have difference priorities, temperaments and preferences. That can provide fuel for friction between housemates.
If you’re a first-time renter – for example, an Ohio University or Ohio State student transitioning from the dorms to a rental house or apartment – the potential for friction is all the higher. However, don’t despair. Following are some helpful suggestions for getting along with your new housemates in Athens or Columbus (or wherever).
How Do You and Your Housemates Pay the Bills?
Misunderstandings or disagreements over who pays the utility and other bills and how they’re divided are common in situations with multiple housemates. In college, with young people who aren’t accustomed to paying utility bills, the potential for friction is even higher. A variety of strategies are available for making this process simple and equitable, though some work better than others.
Under one option, each housemate receives a particular utility or service bill, so one person doesn’t have to handle all of them, not to mention the distasteful chore of hounding other housemates for money every month. If everyone has that responsibility for one or two bills, each housemate will be more likely to cooperate when asked for his or her share of the other bills. Handling bills this way will minimize the risk of one housemate getting saddled with all of the bills if a housemate moves out without paying, or just refuses to pay.
You also may be able to have each housemate arrange automatic pay-outs for his or her monthly obligations with bills. You better believe it; you’ll appreciate not having to hector your housemates for their share of the bills.
Some housemates set up a bank account for the apartment or rental house. Each person automatically contributes a set amount each month. Bills and other expenses (maybe even groceries) can be paid from this account. You’d just have to carefully watch the account to make sure it doesn’t get overdrawn.
So Who Gets Which Bedroom?
In a typical rental house (and less frequently in an apartment), some bedrooms are larger than others. Or if size isn’t the issue, some bedrooms may have other characteristics that make them more desirable than others. This can include having more closet space, a better window situation, a location closer to the bathroom, etc. If, for example, you have a four-bedroom house, how do you decide which of you or your three housemates will get the best bedroom? Or the second-best bedroom? Or the worst one?
Many college students just end up drawing lots, flipping coins or playing rock, paper scissors to determine who gets which bedrooms. This, however, can seed underlying grievances among the losers that fester over time and create bad blood.
A more equitable solution is to charge a higher share of the rent to whoever gets the superior bedroom. Using this method, some of the housemates might be happy to have a smaller or less attractive bedroom in return for lower rent payments.
Who Does the Chores?
One of the biggest potential causes of friction in an apartment or rental house situation involves how household chores are handled. This includes issues such as who does which chores and how often. Of course, in some rental situations, this is never discussed, and the house or apartment becomes a pigsty. Many OU or Ohio State alums probably still have nightmares about the Animal House where they lived in college.
Instead of letting that happen, devise a plan of action on household chores the first week you move into your Columbus or Athens rental. Create a list of all the chores that will need to be done – dishwashing, vacuuming, dusting, taking out the trash and recycling, etc. Then decide how often each task needs to be done. In an ideal situation, each housemate will volunteer to perform a different task once a week (or after each meal if it’s dish-washing). You can keep it that way, or perhaps rotate duties on a weekly or monthly basis. In many college rental situations, where occupants eat individually on different schedule, each person is expected to buy their own groceries, cook their own food, and wash their own dishes. Laundry can be handled the same way; everyone washes their own clothes.
However you decide to handle this, it’s essential that you get an explicit buy-in from each housemate at the very beginning. This minimizes the risk of misunderstandings and friction later on.
Just Because You’re Different Doesn’t Mean You Won’t Get Along
Three or four housemates rarely share character traits and preferences. Much more common is a situation where you have three or four housemates who have unique and different personalities, with their own tastes in music, TV and food. More often than not, they get along anyway. However, for this to work, some ground rules should be established. This may include no loud music after 10 p.m., nobody allowed to hog the TV programing, and no smoking inside.
We can’t say this enough – which is why we’re saying it again – establish a bill-paying system, an equitable chore roster, and ground rules for amicable living in your first week of living together. The sooner the better.